my own feelings or thoughts?

I always believe myself to make the correct choice when i have 2~ I always believe myself that i see and select the correct ppl to trust on~

But now today, i sitting here writing my blog and wondering myself,

1. did i made the correct choice for my own?
2. did i put my trust on the correct ppl?
3. can i ever protect myself from being hurt again and again?

I am very afraid that this time i believe the wrong person either my best friends, my closest friends, my cousins or even my boyfriend~

All of a sudden i'm really afraid~ well, honestly i not suppose to post here but still this is the only place where i tell out my true thoughts or feelings~

I afraid that my current relationship or future relationship will happen the same thing like last time~ all my partners told before that how loyal are they~ and suddenly out of no where i found out that they did something behind of me~

Can i ever trust every single word that my partner says? Now i can easily understand someone when i wanted to~ once i understand i will really understand but did you all knows that behind of everyone there is a devil with have everything of yours?

no matter how loyal is the person is and once he or she did a mistake, the person will hide it from telling to his / her partner no matter the mistake is either betrayal, lying, etc etc~ what is the reason that they always give after the partner found out?

1. "i just dont want you to worry about me"
2. "i dun wan you to think too much"
3. "i dont wanna lose you"
4. "you are the most important person in my life. that is the reason i hide it from you"

But the partner always believe.... You know why?

Because that partner still love him/her~ inside the person they always the so called kindness when it is about someone they love~ but still the one that hurt the most is always me for the pass 2 years~

By,
♂♥ Michelle ♥♀

P.S : Everyone has a devil behind it owner's shadow~ Red represents of anger, hatred and fire~ My devil are always in front of my leading my way thru the darkness~ Red is my favorite colour out of all~ I am sorry for what i have done so far~ Thousand of apologize~